Maybe You're the Problem...and the Solution [VIDEO INSIDE]
Photo Wendy Yalom
I want to tell you the story of a client of mine that we will call Heather.
Heather seemingly had it all: a thriving (and growing) business, a loving family, loyal friends and lots of external support.
The problem was, she just couldn’t see it.
In fact, she was convinced that the world was failing her.
Heather was so attached to her story of everyone else being the problem that she was completely unable to see her part.
Every session, she would come in with a new person who let her down.
She was even mad at me when we first started working together..
Then it was her mother; then it was her friends; then it was the people who she hired to work for her (there were even lawsuits threatened); then it was her boyfriend…
And no, I am not exaggerating.
Each month, there was a new drama, and each month we had to work her out of the same persistent story.
This isn’t to say that everything was her fault, but she was indeed the common denominator in each situation, and the story was always the same.
Here’s the truth: we are a part of all the relationships we have: our partners, our families, our co-workers, our friends…
Which means we contribute to the dynamics we are living in.
And accepting that forces us to accept that we are sometimes locked into a story instead of seeing things clearly.
Because it sure seems a lot easier to point a finger at the other person.
Except that it’s not.
Because if the other person is the problem, we can’t do anything about it. We are stuck in victim.
So when you are in conflict, ask yourself:
Can I see this person differently?
Can I see the situation from a different angle?
How do I think they are perceiving me?
What do I think their story of the situation is?
This doesn’t mean that we absolve others of their responsibility to the relationship, but it does empower us to start creating the relationships we want.
Because when we are open to seeing things from all angles, we are able to show up the way we want to show up, and have the experience we want to have.
Because here’s the thing: even when our initial feeling is one thing, that doesn’t mean we can’t learn to see it from another perspective.
One that feels good, even in the face of disagreement, disappointment and conflict.
We can learn the tools to navigate all of our relationships from a center that supports ourselves, as well as the people around us.
And those tools will be what makes the difference between surviving and thriving…because once we figure out how to do it in one dynamic, we can apply it to all of them, even the more challenging ones.
The Truth is:
The secret to having good relationships is YOU.
How you show up for yourself AND how you show up for your people.
And the stories you tell yourself about your dynamics and connection.
Because let’s face it: relationships can be hard.
But they don’t have to be.
And that’s why I created:
Relationships: The Master ClassI
In it, I give you the tools you need to not only connect with the relationships in your life, but do what it takes to make them incredible.
A healthy relationship can be the most powerful container for growth and healing that you will ever have.
But you have to consciously show up for it.
Relationships: The Master Class is a seven module course that teaches you how to create masterful relationships in every facet of your life.
Here's How It Works:
Every week, for six weeks, you will receive a new pre-recorded module in your portal.
Modules are:
How To Show Up For The Relationships You Want (open NOW)
How To Be Courageous In Your Relationships (opens a week later)
How To Stay True To You In Relationships (opens a week later)
How To Resolve Conflict In Your Relationships (opens a week later)
How To Love Yourself (opens a week later)
How To Love Your Body (opens a week later)
In November 2022, the seventh module "Surviving Family & Holidays" will be recorded and it will be added to your portal.
Each module includes a lecture, class notes, a guided reiki bath and homework to work on until the next module is released.
A very special relationship meditation practice is given to you at the start of the course to help you integrate what you learn throughout the course.
You will have access to the Master Class for one year from the date of your purchase.