Trusting Yourself In Relationships
I am going to share a secret with you: what we think is making us comfortable is actually what is making us miserable.
And that’s because we aren’t actually comfortable - it just feels familiar.
But familiarity is often what keeps us stuck.
Which means that we can claim responsibility for the way our lives look and feel by stepping out of our comfort zones.
And while that might feel a little scary or overwhelming, it’s actually quite simple and empowering.
Because when you own that responsibility, you can make the changes you need to get you to where you want to be.
So when Beth started working with me, she was struggling to meet a partner, and we got to take a good look at that.
She had an admitted pattern of catastrophic breakups, and she was unsure how to break the loop of "over-giving to toxic relationships."
More than anything, she wanted to connect with and stay connected to healthy, happy, and supportive partner.
She felt like she didn’t know where to begin but we soon discovered that she didn’t actually have any trouble meeting people.
She really just struggled trusting them.
Over and over, if anyone did the slightest thing outside of what she expected, she would freak out.
Overwhelmed by the enormous pressure she was projecting onto them, this would almost always mark the end of the relationship.
The problem was that it was so difficult and so painful for her to steady herself during these experiences that she was unconscious of what she was doing.
In fact, she felt quite justified in her outbursts…until it was too late.
(And I’m sure you can connect the dots and see that this pattern didn’t just show up in dating - it showed up in ALL of her relationships.)
So I offered a different approach: what if instead of learning how to trust others, she worked on learning to trust herself?
The most she had to lose in this scenario was an outdated sense of self.
What she had to gain was everything she wanted.
So we began our grand experiment.
It wasn’t anything crazy. She was assigned a very specific daily meditation practice and worked on taking small earthly actions every single day.
And guess what…Beth just came back from her first-weekend getaway with her new love.
And she had an AMAZING time.
But it wasn’t because he’s any different or showed up for her any better than the ones that came before him.
It’s because SHE is showing up differently for herself.
And when she started showing up differently for herself, she didn’t need her partner to be perfect for her to feel safe.
And while this is a story about Beth finding love, it’s not just a story about finding love.
It’s about anyone looking for better relationships in their life: with their family, their current partner, their friends, their coworkers…
Because here’s the thing:
The secret to having good relationships is YOU.
How you show up for yourself AND how you show up for your people.
And the stories you tell yourself about your dynamics and connection.
Because let’s face it: relationships can be hard.
But they don’t have to be.
And that’s why I created:
Relationships: The Master Class
In it, I give you the tools you need to not only connect with the relationships in your life, but do what it takes to make them incredible.
A healthy relationship can be the most powerful container for growth and healing that you will ever have.
But you have to consciously show up for it.
Relationships: The Master Class is a seven module course that teaches you how to create masterful relationships in every facet of your life.
Here's How It Works:
Every week, for six weeks, you will receive a new pre-recorded module in your portal.
Modules are:
A Deep Dive Into Relationships (open NOW)
Heart Centered Courage (opens a week later)
Maintaining Autonomy & Alignment (opens a week later)
Resolving Conflict (opens a week later)
The Most Important Relationship Of All (opens a week later)
Embodying Love (opens a week later)