5 Ways To Stay Committed To Your Goals

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Years ago, Gingersnap’s Organic, my plant-based cafe in Manhattan, was just a far-fetched dream.

I dreamed of creating healing, vibrant foods. I dreamed of sharing the power of plant-based eating with others. I dreamed of bringing a wholesome, holistic view of health to the people of New York.

But it felt like an impossible dream. It felt too big for me. It felt too far beyond my reach.


You’ve felt this way before, right? Maybe you’re sitting in this feeling right now. Dreaming of leaving your cubicle job. Dreaming of a ‘round-the-world trip. Dreaming of a healthy, strong body. Dreaming of writing your memoir.

Dreaming, but never doing.

Too often, we let our brightest dreams die.

Sometimes, we never even start pursuing our far-off goal, and our bright vision gradually fades. Other times, we leap into action at the first spark of inspiration...only to give up when the work has barely begun.

It’s painful, isn’t it? To hold space a dream inside for years, only to see it never happen? Only to let doubt and distraction kill your passion? Only to fail, again and again and again?

You’re not alone. You’re capable and deserving of reaching your biggest, scariest goal.

Every day, I work with my clients to overcome mental blocks, clear destructive patterns, and bring their dreams into reality.

Here are five tools I give them to help them reach their goals:

THE ONLY LIMIT TO YOUR IMPACT IS YOUR IMAGINATION AND COMMITMENT
— TONY ROBBINS

1. SPEAK YOUR GOALS

Stop holding your goals, your dreams, and your truths in silence. Talk about what you want to create in your life.

There is great power in speaking your goals. Voicing your dreams opens you up to collective support, forward momentum, and unexpected synchronicity.

When I decided to open Gingersnap’s Organic, I started to talk about what I was doing before I even had a plan. These conversations opened into providential connections I never would have imagined.

Through these conversations, I met a realtor (who showed me spaces for the cafe), a New York Times editor (who wrote a publicity feature), and a chef (who helped develop our raw, vegan recipes).

A million connections later, Gingersnap’s was born. Can you imagine what connections you’re missing by keeping your dream in silence?

 

2. FIND ACCOUNTABILITY FOR YOUR GOALS

Right now, the finish line is miles away. Achieving your goal is a long journey, and you need support and encouragement along the way. Don’t try to do this alone.

You need someone who will cheer you on, ask you the hard questions, and be honest with you in the middle of the mess. 

One word of caution: sometimes, it’s safer to choose an accountability person who is a step outside of your inner circle. This gives them objective distance, and protects you from the potential conflict of working with your best friend or partner.  

3. PRIORITIZE YOUR GOALS

Don’t get ahead of yourself. You have a long road ahead of you, and you’ll get overwhelmed and discouraged if you try to plan, consider, and accomplish everything at once.

Your next book or your new business won’t be birthed overnight—and my cafe certainly wasn’t!

Allow the process to take time, and focus on one step at a time.

Write a list, in order, of the steps involved, so that you can clear your head. Then, focus one one small goal at a time. And keep your eyes on that one small goal, instead of allowing the stress of all the steps combined to overwhelm you.

For example, if you’re trying to find a new job (which might take months) don’t worry about handing in your two week notice before you’ve rewritten your resume, honed your skills, or applied for a new job.

One step at a time.

4. STRUCTURE YOUR GOALS

Your initial spark of motivation, excitement, and inspiration won’t last forever. Along the way to reaching your goal, there will be many distractions and moments of doubts.

In those moments, you’ll be tempted to abandon the project you were once so excited about.

To push through this resistance, embrace structure and discipline as tools that will help you make your dream a reality.

Structure can take different forms, depending on your personality and your goal—you can set appointments with yourself, schedule “goal” time into your daily calendar, or create rituals that help you stay on track.

For example, if you are trying to be more active, you might schedule four workouts into your weekly calendar. Then, treat these sessions as unbreakable appointments.

Even on days when you’re not feeling well, look for creative ways to honor your commitment. Maybe, instead of an intense workout, you spend that time meditating, taking a bath, or going for a slow walk...anything that keeps you aligned and true to your goal. 

This scheduled time will help you show up and take action, even when you feel like abandoning the ship.  

Remember, The subconscious loves to throw distractions and reasons we can not complete our goals. When you are truly committed to your goals, you find a way to stay on track even during the "chaos" of life.

5. TAKE ACTION TOWARDS YOUR GOALS

So, friend, this is where the magic happens. But this is also where the fear shows up for most people. Trust me, I’ve been there.

Instead of getting overwhelmed by the hugeness of your goal, stay focused on your smaller priorities along the way.

Center your focus by writing down a few tiny action steps in a special journal every morning. Remember to be realistic and gentle with your expectations.

Writing down these small action steps creates momentum and moves your goal from your headspace into the real world.

Bonus: crossing off your actions steps each day will also lead to feelings of accomplishment—you’re getting shit done!  


If you’re ready to get serious about your biggest dreams + goals, you may want to welcome extra support into your life. Sounds dreamy? Let’s work together to open your perspective and create lasting change.

All of my coaching offerings are completely individualized, which means that there’s an option for you—whether you need energy healing to work through a mental block, intuitive coaching to help you create a detailed action plan, or a safe space to speak freely about your goals without judgment or fear. Click here to find out more.

An Intimate and Personal Conversation with My Dear Friend Nico Tortorella

I wish we could sit down in a quiet cafe and trade stories.

You know that magical feeling of connection when another human looks you in the eyes and speaks their truth to you?

I crave that. (And, since you’re a part of this community, I’m guessing you crave that too.)

But since we can’t do that today, I want to offer you a piece of my story that you probably haven’t heard before.

I’m gonna be honest with you...I almost didn’t post this.

Some of the stuff you’re about to hear is incredibly vulnerable. So vulnerable that it makes me really uncomfortable to invite you into it.

But I’ve learned that the things that make me the most uncomfortable are the things that are most important for me to act on (can anyone else relate to this?).

Anyway, here it is...

My intimate conversation with Nico Tortorella, a past love and a current dear friend, over on The Love Bomb Podcast (Episode 39).

You’ll hear me open up about...

  • the magic of my favorite number

  • the beginning of my eating disorder (and what finally healed me)

  • how I feel when I look in the mirror

  • the many different love relationships I’ve had in my life

  • my biggest heartbreak...and how it opened me to the perfect new life path

  • my views on monogamy, marriage, and passionate friendships

  • why french fries (and other indulgent foods) should be a part of a holistic diet
  • ...and much more

 

I’d love to invite you to be a part of it. Listen here.

 

 

Getting Back On Track After A Vacation

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Summer is a beautiful time to step away from your normal routine and visit a new city, go on an adventure, or relax by the ocean. Vacations can be the perfect medicine when we’re feeling overworked, stressed, and burnt out. But sometimes, traveling takes a toll on our bodies. Maybe it’s a week of eating out, or a few extra glasses of wine, or one too many late nights.

 

After taking time off, I struggle to get back into my healthy routines and rituals. This upheaval often leads to a cycle of non-beneficial behavior. I fall into old patterns: not moving my body, not focusing on work that matters to me, not caring for my body with nourishing foods.

This downward spiral can bring me to a place of deep, dark depression.

If you’ve been following along on my Instagram stories, you may have seen that while traveling I’ve been eating dairy, gluten, and sugar in copious amounts (← the phrase my loving husband uses to describe my intake of foods that my body doesn’t like).

Now, before I continue, I need to make one thing clear…

Having battled a serious eating disorder, I’m grateful to be in a place where I can enjoy unhealthy foods without guilt, fear, or panic. I’m truly thankful that I can live in the moment and enjoy a sweet, sugary pastry without experiencing massive anxiety.

For years, I lived on steamed veggies and pushed my undernourished body to endure hours of workouts every day.

For years, I never consumed bread, butter, desserts, french fries—just seeing those foods filled me with intense fear.

For years, my friends and family stared at me across the dinner table, watching to see what I ordered, or what I ate, or if I was okay.

Today, my relationship with my diet and my body is very different. I embrace a zero-restrictions practice in my approach to food. I’m allowed to eat anything I want to. Food is neither “good” or “bad.”

However, I know that certain types of food make me feel vibrant, energetic, and alive, and I choose to eat more of those ingredients. For example, eating gluten leaves me feeling exhausted and in pain, so I consciously avoid gluten-heavy foods.  

But I’m human...and sometimes I make exceptions.

Vacations are one of those times when I stray outside the bounds of my normal healthy practices, and sometimes that leads to overindulgence.

After a week of less-than-nourishing eating, I’m tempted to slip into these unhealthy rhythms and embrace them as “the new normal.” I get used to consuming sugar and gluten every day. I get used to feeling sluggish, unmotivated, and bloated.

Can you relate?

It’s dangerously easy to fall into negative patterns, and it’s so important to be intentional when you return from a trip filled with booze, late nights, and lots of extra treats.

When I’m returning home, post-vacation, I immediately commit to positive choices and mindful change...beginning the morning after my return.

Here’s how I get back on track (so that I can start feeling alert, vibrant, and recharged again):

  1. Double my water intake. Since hydration is so closely connected to health, I try to practice this while on vacation as well.

  2. Take my daily probiotic. I try to stay consistent with this while traveling too, and, on my first day back, I’ll take a second capsule later in the day. This is the only daily supplement I take, and it makes a huge difference with my digestion—especially when I consume lots of rich foods. My go to probiotic is Prescripts Probiotic.

  3. Practice intermittent fasting. I naturally eat breakfast on the later side, but during a “reset,” I specifically focus on giving my digestive system a break by refraining from eating for sixteen hours (which then gives me eight hours each day to eat my meals). This allows my body to heal and rest, while also helping me to break the cravings that were created by eating foods that aren’t a normal part of my eating habits. Intermittent fasting isn’t a good fit for everyone, so spend some time on research and decide if it’s a healthy practice for you.

  4. Schedule three workouts for the week of my return. For me, this might be a scheduled workout at a boutique gym, a walk-and-talk date with a friend, or an appointment with myself that I refuse to break—focus on choosing workouts that excite and motivate you. I schedule my first workout for the morning after I return, and I often complete this workout on an empty stomach. This might work for you, and it might not. Every body is different.

  5. Consume blended meals for the first day. I like to stick to liquid meals when I’m starting a reset, in order to be gentle with my digestive system while also getting lots of nutrition. As you may now, at Gingersnap’s, we offered a wide variety of cleanses. My favorite was the [GO] Blend, which included healthy amounts of fiber and fats. This was my go-to liquid fuel when I got back from vacations, and I now i use recipes from my book, Juice It, Blend It, Live It: Over 50 Easy Recipes to Energize, Detox, and Nourish Your Mind and Body. As a general guideline, I’ll make five savory blends and one fruit blend on my first day back. 

  6. Get my sweat on. I am in love with infrared saunas (I’ll post more about these soon), but any sauna experience is a great way to jumpstart the detox process and eliminate toxins from your body.

  7. Take a hot bath. I love to create a relaxing, sacred, healing space with Epsom salts, candles, sage, incense, and music. I always bring a big glass of water with me, because, as the toxins are released, I often feel tired and wiped out, and a cool drink of water is rejuvenating.

  8. Read something inspiring. At any given time, you can find me reading a variety of different books. When I’m back from vacation, I usually choose ones that motivate me to get working. So, in the sauna or the bathtub, I’ll often choose an inspiring, motivating text to read. This helps me move out of vacation mode and into a place of taking action.

  9. Gently add whole foods. After a day of eating only blended foods, I begin to add solid foods back into my diet. I keep it light at first and typically maintain a plant-based diet for a few days, making simple, basic meals based on a few wholesome ingredients.

  10. Rest. For the first few days after travel, I avoid making too many plans or setting over-ambitious deadlines. This gives me time to settle in and get grounded without stress, pressure, or anxiety.

 

If you choose to begin a “reset” practice after a business trip or family vacation, I want you to keep one thing in mind…

None of these practices are based on punishment, deprivation, or restriction. You want to be in a mindset of self-care and self-love, not harsh self-discipline.

I know that my mental and physical health are impacted by my eating choices, and I want to live in a feeling of rested, vibrant energy. I enjoy indulging in a few special treats on vacation, but I know that if I eat that way for too long, it negatively impacts my energy and my health—and I don’t want to accept sluggishness, brain fog, or bloating as “normal.”

At the end of the day, this is about empowering you to create healthy, long-term habits (that support your once-in-a-while indulgences). If  you are looking to take your life to the next level, book a one on one session with Jamie

"Food is an important part of a balanced diet."

Fran Lebowitz

The Detox Everyone Should Be On

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“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” ― Anaïs Nin

We’re all familiar with the idea of detoxing. Maybe you’ve even participated in an official detox process before, cleansing your body with lemon water, raw juices, or a celebrity-endorsed weight-loss tea.

It’s easy to recognize when we need a physical detox. We start to feel bloated, sluggish, or inflamed, in our physical bodies, and we realize it’s time to lay off the morning latte habit or afternoon pastry breaks. It’s time to reorient our eating habits to bring more lightness and energy to our lives.

Some people call me “the Detox Queen.” But they’re not just referring to my love for clean, healthy eating.

You see, here’s my personal philosophy: detoxing–or, quite literally, removing toxins—is relevant in every area of life.

With all of pop culture’s attention on body-centric detoxes that focus on what we are eating or drinking, it’s easy to lose sight of other areas of our life that might need to be cleaned up.

It’s time to get honest, friends.

Let’s talk about the toxic people in our lives—and, more importantly, let’s talk about how to manage the energy we surround ourselves with.

You might be wondering...why do I care so much about this? Here’s my answer: because no amount of juice cleansing is going to take care of the shame, negativity, or anxiety you’re dealing with because of damaging relationships. And emotional trauma will sabotage your physical health no matter how clean you’re eating.

So, let’s take a deep breath. This is important (even if it’s uncomfortable).


Fact: some people live in a constant cycle of negativity, and they can’t help but spread that negative energy through their words and actions. I’m guessing you know some of these people (and you may have been one of these people at one point in your past).

  • Have you noticed that, when you’re with certain people, your sense of confidence is replaced with feelings of inadequacy and fear?

  • Have you noticed that, when you’re with certain people, voices of unworthiness and doubt start to creep into your headspace?

  • Have you noticed that, when you’re with certain people, your heart (or maybe your stomach) begin to feel heavy or guilty?

Imperfect humans (hint: that’s all of us) can introduce toxic voices that are much more damaging than processed sugar or gluten-full carbs.


Another fact: some people bring positivity and wellness to every interaction.

I recognized this from a very young age. My mother had a crew—they called themselves the yayas—and still to this day, over forty years later, they are still each other’s chosen family.  They are the ones on the other end of the phone when congratulations are in order, and they are the ones to sit with when things are difficult and painful.

These are true friends.

True Friends hold space for you to be you. They’re there to show you how to show up. They’re the ones who accept and inspire every aspect of your personality, judgement-free.

You know what I’m talking about, right? Just hashing things out with the right friend can take you from a ten to a three on the anxiety scale, in a matter of moments (just like hashing things out with the wrong person can raise your anxiety through the roof in seconds.)

I was so lucky to spend this a full weekend with my true girl friends, and it really took me to a space of deep gratitude and heartfelt love. They’re the type of friends who call me higher. They help me to dig in deep and to let go of the things that don't serve me.  


Which type of person is most present in your life?

  1. Have you surrounded yourself with inspiring people who support you without trying to fix you, who see you without trying to “save” you, who accept you without trying to change you?
  2. Or are you surrounded by toxic people who, because of where they’re at on their own journeys, aren’t ready to support you, offer you a safe space, or lift you up?

This isn’t about pointing fingers or casting judgement. It’s about taking control of your own energy and emotions, so that you can live into your best self.

So, if you’re tempted to take on a victim mindset or rant about all the toxic people in your life right now, I want you to take a step back. Instead of blaming others for their negative energy and toxicity, choose a path of radical responsibility.

Your happiness is up to you. Your peace is up to you. Your contentment is up to you.

And if that means that you need to bring more boundaries or space into your life, the time is now. This might mean that you’re moving away from certain people in your life, but don’t make it about them. This is about you.


Let’s make this really practical.

You’re in control of your energy and emotions, and one of the ways you can claim control is by intentionally choosing to surround yourself with people who lift you up.

Take a look around you. Step into the feeling of what your different friends bring out of you. Take notice.

  • Are there people that make you question your worth? Who bring an attitude of judgment to the relationship? What would it feel like to let them go? To remove the toxicity from your life?
  • Are there people that inspire you to believe in yourself and your highest calling? Who help you work through your “stuff” and come out on the other side? How would your life change if you spent more time with these safe, supportive people?

If you feel like you can’t let someone go (along with their drama, their judgement, and their negativity), remember that you’re as free as you allow yourself to be.
 

“Life does not have to constantly be a fight. Nobody gets brownie points for suffering. You can let yourself be happy. It's allowed.” –Allison Fallon

Suffering through toxic relationships won’t bring you any closer to healing or wholeness. It’s okay to cut the cord and choose new relationships that fill your heart with happiness.

This process isn’t easy, and, many times, we need support to go through this process of surrounding ourselves with people who bring the right energy into our lives.

If you’re ready to move towards healthier friendships (and don’t know how to take the first step), I’d love to sit with you and open up a safe space to discuss boundaries, personal responsibility, and the energy you exchange with the people on a daily basis. Schedule a time here.

Relationships are meant to be light-giving and life-giving...I challenge you to embrace that possibility.

How To Overcome Anxiety

For many years, anxiety was a part of my daily reality. I woke up in a panic and went to bed feeling completely drained from stress and fear. It wasn’t necessarily screaming all day, but there was often a quiet whisper of unease.

My anxiety showed up in may areas of my life, from my relationship to food, to my  business. On my best days, it was a slight whisper. And on my worst days, I could barely get out of bed.

I know I’m not alone in this.

Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the United States. According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA), 40 million Americans over the age of 18 are affected by anxiety — roughly 18 percent of the nation’s population.

You’ve probably experienced anxiety too…the sense of uncontrollable, panicked, intense worry. The racing heartbeat, the pressure inside your ribcage, the shortness of breath, the racing of fearful thoughts.

For many of us, anxiety is situational—it’s caused by a circumstance, environment, or person in our life. Recently, for me, it was my work. For you, it might be something else.  Maybe it’s your job. Maybe it’s a social situation. Maybe it's dating. Maybe it’s something that triggers insecurity, like scrolling though social media or dating apps, or going to an event where you won't know a lot of people. No matter what it is, that trigger can feel paralyzing and it's helpful to have tools to get yourself back to a headspace of calm.

Ideally, we could walk away from whatever it is that brings up anxiety in our lives. But sometimes that’s not possible, and necessarily the right thing to do.

When I work with my one-on-one clients, they often share similar experience. It seems as if there’s an area in everyone’s life that brings up anxiety, fear, and dread.  

There are difficult situations in all of our lives—it’s part of the human condition.

You don’t have to wait until your circumstances change for your experience to change.  And while I always encourage people to seek to bring about change so that their lives are not filled with anxiety, it’s crucial to find a way to move through anxiety and choose peace in the midst of your difficult situation.

So, what’s the solution?

Even though I was still stuck in my circumstances, I was ready to let go of anxiety and release it from my life.  I had no choice, I had to get out of bed, I had to show up.  I was lucky, I had a bunch of tools that could help me get out what felt like paralyzing fear and into a state of action. I hope the tools below can help you to get out of the fear and into the action.

Here are some of the ways I reclaimed peace, joy, and light in my life. If you’re ready to take the first step towards reframing your mindset, keep reading.


ACTION

"Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action." Walter Anderson 

Action is the number one thing I need to do to get myself out of the anxiety. I recognized that as long as I could get out of my head and into some form of action, the fear would start to dissipate. After taking small steps to remove myself from the paralyzing cycle of anxiety and negativity, the attack would minimize. These steps can be so small, but so alleviating.  

These small, first actions aren’t easy, so be gentle as you work on yourself. And in the midst of it all, repeat these words:

Either I grow, or my anxiety grows. It’s my choice.

Below are some of my go-to steps for getting myself out of fear and into action. Some days I use all of them, and some times just one.  All of them, help to take you out of your head and into your body so that you can release the panic and move into action.

BREATHWORK

When the panic came on, I would immediately feel it in my chest.  At times, it literally felt like I couldn’t breathe, and I knew I had to get control over that.

One of my favorite parts of my yoga teacher trainings was always the breathwork. I noticed that the more attention I put on my breath, the more control I had over my anxiety.  So when the “morning scaries” would start, I’d start incorporating breathwork into my morning ritual and my daily life.

Conscious deep-breathing activates our parasympathetic nervous system and brings our bodies into a state of deep, renewing rest and calm.

So, in the middle of an anxiety attack, conscious breathwork can be the most powerful action you can take.

Here’s one of my favorites breathwork exercises that you can practice on your own:

First, get into a comfortable position, whether lying down or sitting. Place one hand on your heart and one hand on your belly, and begin taking long, slow breaths. Pay attention to the breathe in your body.  Really feeling it coming in on the inhale and letting it out on the exhale.

After a few breath cycles, start counting. Inhale through your nose for five seconds and then exhale through your mouth for the same amount of time.

Focus your attention on filling your belly, then your ribs, and then your chest…then slowly release. Really feel it filling you up, the warmth going through your nose, the fullness of your belly, ribs and chest and then the relief of slowly letting it out through your mouth.

In less than ten minutes, you will begin to enter a headspace of calm, grounded logic.

You can practice this in public as well. Many times, I’ve found a quiet restroom or taken a walk outside while focusing on my breath.  

MOVEMENT

I have always believed that physical movement is a key part to handling my moods and fears. As early as I can remember I knew: the more I moved my body, the more I experienced peace and lightness. So I began incorporating more movement into my daily life. Studies have shown that regular participation in exercise decreases overall levels of tension, elevates and stabilizes one’s mood, improves sleep, and improves self-esteem.

Ideally, I shoot for one hour of dedicated movement five days a week. This can be riding my bike, yoga, boxing, or anything that feels fun and challenging.  

I also noticed that short spurts of movement can help in the moments that anxiety is actually hitting. When I feel overwhelmed and have to step back, I have been choosing quick bursts of movement in order to move the anxiety out. Even five minutes of aerobic exercise can begin to stimulate anti-anxiety effects.

So, I have found that blasting a high-energy song and either dancing around my apartment, bouncing on my rebounder, or doing jumping jacks can quickly change my mood into a place of joy that lessens the stories of all the worries.

It changes the energy of my body and my head. And while these steps didn’t rid me of anxiety completely, it became an important daily ritual that helped me stay centered, even during stressful situations.

JOURNALING

There are times when the anxiety becomes worse, and doing the above just wasn’t enough. The stories of all my inadequacies, and all the worst case scenarios would get so loud that it would feel like forward action wasn’t possible.

In those moments, when my mind began to race with anxious thoughts, I’d pull out my journal. I’d write out all my worries about the future in detail—literally writing out my worst fears. Articulating my panicked thoughts helped me to recognize that most of my fears were completely unfounded and unlikely.

We often are so caught up in the fear of what might happen that we get overwhelmed. We begin to live in the terrible, negative energy of something that hasn’t even happened. This is why it’s so crucial to reframe your thoughts and choose a new perspective. We have the power to see things the way we want to see them. Claim that power.

Journaling was a way to see the craziness that I was thinking and dismiss it more easily.  


By bringing these practices into my life, I was able to get to a place of "knowing" that my anxiety would leave once I got into action. Through breathwork, movement, and journaling, I could get back into my correct mind and accept that the fear I was creating was not real. I could choose to release the weight of anxiety and step into a place of peace.

And that’s my wish for you—that your life would be flooded with peace, even during the most difficult situations that you face.

Breaking Negative Patterns-One easy ritual to rewire your self sabotaging patterns

PHOTO A WILD DOVE

PHOTO A WILD DOVE

We’ve all been there. It’s the end of a long day, a family member makes an ill-timed comment, and we fly off the handle. For a moment, we feel entitled to our anger and frustration.
 
But a split second later — we’re flooded with regret, guilt, shame. 
 
Again, we’ve allowed a negative pattern to control our actions instead of allowing love + light to fuel our responses. Again, we’re speaking from a place of fear, scarcity, or ego. Again.

YOU MUST FIRST IMPROVE YOUR MINDSET, BEFORE YOU CAN IMPROVE YOUR LIFE.
— LEWIS HOWES

 Over these past few months, I’ve been thinking a lot about patterns, and the power they hold in our lives. 
 
As I’ve transitioned out of the fast-paced, high-stress life of owning a Manhattan cafe, I’ve reassessed and rebuilt many of the rhythms that define my life.
 
My rushed anxiety filled mornings have been replaced by an intentional mindful start...No matter how much earlier I might have to wake up, my morning starts with meditation, intention setting and journaling. This is non negotiable for me...
 
I used to work sun-up to sun-down to keep Gingersnap’s running. Now, I might spend my day doing things that feed my soul. Intentionally, that includes helping clients move towards healing and empowerment.
 
Dread and resentment towards my career have shifted towards pleasure, joy, and gratitude. I’ve become myself again, the same little girl who lined up crystals on her windowsills and lived from a soul-deep place of trust.
 
New choices. New experiences. New patterns.
 
Now, I see you, reading this in your claustrophobic cubicle at the end of a long day, or scrolling through this on your phone after another tense conversation with your partner.
 
You’re tempted to say: Well, that’s nice for her.
 
Or you’re tempted to ask: Why not me? 
 
But I’m going to ask that question right back at you. Why NOT you?
 
Sure, it might not be the right time for you to walk away from your stagnant career or stale relationship. 
 
But it’s always the right time to claim a new perspective, open yourself up to new opportunities, and step into a space of empowerment.
 
And sometimes, the biggest changes start with the smallest baby-steps.
 
So no matter where you’re at in your journey towards claiming your ideal life, I want to share a simple exercise that will help you build a healthy pattern in one crucial area of your life: communication.


I want you to think back to a recent, frustrating conversation with someone in your life: a friend, your neighbor, the intern, the in-laws, your partner. 
 
Do you remember the moment where you lost control? Do you remember how you responded with arrogance or with anger, with a sharp tone or a passive aggressive comment? And do you remember how you felt afterwards? Heavy? Guilty? Upset? Tight?
 
Here’s a simple tool to help you break this pattern of broken communication and claim peace in your interactions.

 
First, begin your morning with a mantra. Just for today, I will pause before I react. 
 

As you speak the mantra, lightly touch a piece of jewelry or a spot on your body. Imagine yourself pausing. Taking a breath. Waiting, for just a moment. Imagine what you will feel like when you choose to rise above immediate reaction and instead choose a positive outcome.
 
Then, when you’re triggered to respond harshly to another human during your day, lightly touch that same piece of jewelry or area of your body. Allow yourself a moment to feel the energy of your intention. Just for today, I will pause before I react.
 
This breath of pause will empower you to approach the conversation from a new angle and a new perspective, with empathy instead of anger. And so often, your shifted attitude, from reaction to outcome, will make you more likely to get what you want out of the interaction. 


 If you’re ready to step even deeper into healing, I’d love to work with you to claim opportunities, clear your energy, and help you step into a new place of empowerment. Maybe you’re interested in a short mindset conversation, or maybe you want to dive into a full reiki session that involves crystals, energy healing, and breathwork.
 
Either way, if you’re ready to take radical responsibility for your life and your future, let’s talk.
 

When it might be time to make a change : An Interview with A Wild Dove

The original article was published in A Wild Dove

PHOTO A WILD DOVE 

PHOTO A WILD DOVE 

 

Jamie Graber recently made a change, a big one. After seven years owning the popular West Village cafe Gingersnaps Organic, she chose to focus on wellness and lifestyle coaching and recently launched her new website Organically Jamie. It’s not easy to make a change as an adult, and we wouldn’t be alone in often wondering, “What If?” We spoke with Jamie on how she came to make that leap of faith and what’s lies ahead in her next chapter.

A Wild Dove

So you’ve made a huge transition recently. Many of us are probably experiencing similar desires to make a change but we fear what lies ahead. Can you walk us through your thought process in making the change and offer some guidance for our readers?

Jamie Graber

It was a difficult decision and one that I took a long time to make. As the years rolled along with Gingersnap’s I felt less and less inspired. I sat with that and noticed that I was feeling depressed and each day it was more difficult for me to get up and go. Once I got there, I would see the customers and light up, but often I had to go handle some store emergency. I made lists of the things that lit me up and then lists of what I spent my day doing. I took a look at those lists and saw that they were very different and it was in that moment that I knew I had to make a huge change.

My advice is meditate and journal for a month. Notice what you do daily that makes you happy and what doesn't. 
Make lists and compare them. Get a coach to help you navigate making changes.

A Wild Dove

We love how you refer to your work as Cognitive Reframing Sessions. Can you tell us what that means and share what those sessions are like?

Jamie Graber

It is the idea that you have the ability to choose the way you see the world.  We can choose to see life as happening to us or for us. It is your perception that will change the outcome and the journey. It is finding out the thoughts and beliefs that are holding you back and training yourself to see it differently. It is behavioral training that changes the way you perceive the world. It is similar to the Law of Attraction, but goes deeper than that. You have to sit and see what your blocks are and then we do the work to remove them, through pattern changing and Reiki, which is a subtle body energy work that helps facilitate block removals.

A Wild Dove

That makes total sense to us. Especially since we're all trying the be the best versions of ourselves.
For the busy mamas you coach, what is some advice to help them balance, restore and thrive?

Jamie Graber

Start with knowing that there is a reason they tell you to put your mask on first during the safety portion of flights. You can’t be of service to your family without taking care of yourself first, and that is not being selfish. Finding a way to move your body at least 45 minutes a few times a week. There are so many options. The important part is finding something that works for you, something that is fun and therapeutic.  And I would say a daily, nonnegotiable is to sit quiet for a minimum of 10 minutes and do some form of mediation.  This can be mantra based, guided, anything that helps you sit quiet, and breathe.  Long breaths in and out.

A Wild Dove

Food and cleansing was also such a big part of Gingersnaps, how do you think those themes parlay into the work you're doing now?


Jamie Graber

It all goes back to prioritizing yourself and doing things that make you feel good.  Everyone feels better when they are making conscious choices, whether food, thoughts, company. Some sessions are mostly about food, but that is just a small part.  It is the deeper feelings of self worth that most people have to work on.  When you are loving yourself, it is so much easier to make better food choices.

A Wild Dove

It’s amazing to see you truly following your heart. What are some suggestions you can give to others seeking to empower themselves and follow their dreams?

Jamie Graber

Meditate, sit, quiet your mind.  Take the time to really observe what you are doing daily and see if that is bringing you closer to what you really want. I can’t say enough how important I think having a coach can be. The ability to have someone who can be objective about what they see as your blind spots and then holding you accountable is priceless.

A Wild Dove

What makes you fly?

Jamie Graber

Seeing clients, friends and family make changes in their lives based on our discussions. Laughing with my friends and family. Noticing all the blessings and love that surrounds me. Fun projects with my husband, we are currently copper electroforming crystals.

I opened my dream business, so why was I so miserable?

(Original article posted in Well + Good) As many of you know this was a year of big decisions for me.  After 7 years of owning Gingersnap's Organic, I decided it was time to close the doors.  It was one of the most difficult decisions I have ever made, but thankfully also one of the best.  I wrote an article for Well and Good, to talk about how to know when it's time to walk away. Please see the article below.  The full article is available at Wellandgood.com

photo jay peeples

photo jay peeples

When Gingersnap’s Organic closed up shop in January, it broke (healthy) hearts across New York City who had come to rely on the cult fave West Village raw food and juice bar. Here, owner Jamie Graber talks about how to know when to walk away from something that was everything you ever wanted.

If someone would have told me a year ago that I would walk away from my dream-come-true business serving raw, plant-based, healing food to New York City’s West Village—I would have politely ignored them. I probably would have thought they were crazy.

And yet, here I am. I let go of my dream earlier this year. The one I’d worked for years to achieve, and even more years to sustain. And, yes, I mourned it. But how do I really feel? Surprisingly, I am more optimistic and excited about the future than ever.

This is the part no one told me about going after my dreams: that it’s okay to let them go as well.

But “year ago” me would never have believed it. Back then, I knew exactly what my path was and there was no way for it to be different. I was the owner of Gingersnap’s Organic, a successful cleanse company and cafe that ruled my entire life. As far as I was concerned, I had arrived, and it was all about keeping it going—and my day-to-day was going to remain exactly as it always was, constantly solving problems and never getting to exhale.

It is no shocker to hear that running a restaurant, especially in Manhattan, is hard. There are slim margins and lots of chaos. One thing you can count on: Every day you will be faced with a new problem to solve. It can be as small as running out of an item or as large as, oh crap the juicer isn’t working. Either way, I have been the one solving each and every one of those problems for over six years straight, and frankly, I am tired.

When trying to figure out where I go from here, I had a few choices. I could continue with Gingersnap’s Organic and just accept it as my life, or I could have someone else run it. Neither of those sounded right, so I continued to search for a way out of this feeling. Then I went at a workshop about manifestation, and that is when things started to change.

I could have chosen to continue to down the path of frustration and non-fulfillment, or I could turn left into happiness and inspiration. I chose to make the left.

I signed up for a one-on-one session and that decision forever changed my reality. In my first-time session with Lacy, she asked me an important question: “What if your purpose isn’t Gingersnap’s? What if that’s not it?” For a few months, I couldn’t stop hearing her saying it.

I had this dream job, but I would wake up each day in anxiety. I would say to my husband often, “I’m managing employees and vendors instead of healing people. And I just don’t want to do it.”

Finally, I realized: I could choose to continue down the path of frustration and non-fulfillment, or I could turn left into happiness and inspiration. I chose to make the left.

And so the doors of Gingersnap’s Organic closed at the end January, and I’m excited to say I have never been so fulfilled as I am now. I was so afraid to lose my identity as a business owner that I was blocking myself from getting clear on what my purpose truly is.

PHOTO A WILD DOVE

PHOTO A WILD DOVE

 

Throughout the years, I have spent many days at Gingersnap’s spending time with my clients, talking them through their struggles with food, relationships, and just general how to find happiness in the despair. I have been asked to coach, do relationship therapy, give cooking lessons, speak at events, but I rarely had time to say yes. A while back, I started to accept a small number of clients and worked with them in the few hours I had away from the cafe.

The more time I spent with them, the more I lit up. It opened me up to how I truly can serve people in the best way possible. The truth is, I didn’t open Gingersnap’s because I wanted a restaurant. I wanted to heal people and create community—and in the next phase can do that on an even more grand scale.

So, should you quit your job, leave your husband, or move across the world on a whim? I am in no way advocating that. But I am saying that every struggle can be met with opportunity, as long as you are able to see it. It is important to allow yourself to step away from something that is no longer serving you, even when you are afraid.

As Marianne Williamson says, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world.”

Finding Peace in a Turbulent Time, with Jamie Graber and Anne Marie Imperiale; three-part program: 7–9 p.m. March 20, March 27, and April 3; New York City (address provided upon registration); $199; organicallyjamie.com